So it’s the first full week of my off season and I am struggling. I have been training 5-6 days a week for months and now I do not have a plan or a race to plan for and I am worried that I will slide backwards and all my hard work will disappear. Now the logical part of my brain knows that is a load of crap but the illogical part of me is worried. I worry that if I am not running 5 times for more than 40K a week my weight will creep back on and I will lose my fitness. This is worse than a taper week because at the end of it I know I don't have a race to look forward to…now I have…nothing.
It’s not like I am sitting on the couch and eating bonbons but it feels different and I do not like it. I like a plan, a sense of purpose and I guess I need a direction to be pointed in. I am running 3 times a week as a group leader and I have an indoor cycling class once a week starting Monday but it does not feel like it is enough. I signed up for a half marathon in May as part of Team Diabetes, something I have wanted to do for a long time but May is so far away and it’s too early to start training for it.
Two years ago, I would have been happy to do nothing athletic but not now, now it’s like an addiction and when I do not get my fix, I get crazy. It’s all about balance and I cannot go too far to one extreme or the other; I need to take these next few months to regain my balance. I still need a plan but not a training plan, a different plan. I want to fine tune my running technique, improve my strength and flexibility and loose that last 15 lbs. Its funny how much I have changed, that fat girl happy to sit on the side lines is gone for good and I do not miss her. I like the fit girl I have become, the one that follows her dreams, inspires other to follow theirs and who won’t ever give up.